Jonestown

This past week, my husband Chris and I sat down to watch the CNN special on Jonestown that we'd recorded on DVR. I thought I knew a good amount, of course I have heard the "drinking the koolaid" saying. I even, knowing I'd be watching it and not being a patient person...at all...Googled the story to learn a bit more.

If you don't know much about Jonestown, you should learn about it. One of the ironies that they closed the CNN special was a sign at the site of the mass gathering where all of those 900+ people committed sucide or were killed, that said basically, "Those who don't know the past are doomed to repeat it."

The rise of cults is increasingly understood by experts in the light of the social and pyschological elements they touch upon. And we are increasingly learning about how a person's religious journey then ties into it all. So now that we know so much, you'd think we'd know enough to stop it from happening. The challenge is, so often these things begin "innocently enough." I mean, Jim Jones (who from many angles now looks like a crazy guy) started off as a local preacher in the Methodist Church who got kicked out of his little church in Indiana for trying to integrate it. I mean, just on that level, sounds like he could have gone on to great things, right?

As I prepared to send a list of resources out to my congregation for a Sunday discussion this week on Jonestown, I came across an article from the American Psychological Association that describes how it seems like Jones used George Orwell's 1984 as a guidebook to mind-control! The book was saying that experts should be careful how they research and share findings, because people can take them and use them for harm. I.e. if a social pyschologists discovers a great way to control a group, what a helpful insight for a cult leader!

The truth is we have always struggled with the dangers when well-intentioned discoveries are used for other purposes. I've heard that many researchers who worked on atomic physics were devestated by the use of their research for creating weapons.

I wonder though, as we learn more about incidents like Jonestown...and as we try to remember them as cautionary tales, if we can do so while not distancing ourselves from the always present possibility that someone, somewhere, is still finding ways to draw people into communities that will destroy them later. And I wonder what all of this has to say to us in the church...both as we seek to keep our communities of faith healthy, and also as we seek to invite others into community who perhaps rightfully so, given the example of history, wonder about our motives. It's a call both to forming authentic communities and also, I think, a reminder that we all need to hold each other accountable as we lead. Because even when the body count isn't there, I suspect there are more than a few "charismatic leaders" in a variety of settings who have nonetheless been able to lead people from good intentions into a place that endangers them.

What do you think that might look like today?

Warmth

It is a wet, cold day outside. This fact in itself has helped me focus to get done some e-mails, computer work and reading I needed to tackle. Though really beyond that, today is the sort of day we all just want to curl up under a blanket!

I decided though, after being pent-up this morning and with nothing falling from the sky for the moment, to take a walk. It was chilly, and if I'd have stopped, it would have been uncomfortable. But as anyone knows, a walk on a cold day can be a nice, refreshing thing as long as you keep moving. And of course, it was a blessing (that not everyone has) to be able to end the walk by coming through the door to my house and entering warmth.

Lately, I've been struggling to figure out and hear God's call in my life now. That's the thing they don't always tell you in seminary...sure, God calls you to ministry, but it's not like God's done. God is constantly reshaping and refining that call. After 3 1/2 years in ministry, I have been trying to listen for what's next.

Chris and I were blessed to be able to attend a New Church Start conference last week. And it blew my mind. It was a good opportunity to reflect upon who I am, and what really excites me about ministry. It was also a chance to reflect on what I'm not good at. And what drains me in ministry. I came out of it energized to find new ways to open the community of Christ to people. But I have struggled to know how that pairs with an existing congregation.

The best thing I've done since then has been to not keep this tension to myself. I've talked with colleagues, family, and I've even begin talking with some people at my church. We've underscored the challenge of expecting a pastor (well, maybe it's just me, but I'm not superwoman) to both maintain close relationships within an existing congregation and also develop new ministries for people who might not really connect with that same group. There is still a lot to work out. But as I have shared my struggle and heard the excitement of others for new opportunities in ministry, it is as if this too is a walk through a chilly place. And if we can keep walking, keep trying along the way to stay faithful on the journey, then maybe, by the grace of God, we'll find some warmth.

That's just a bit of what's rolling around in my head...most of it is still really jumbled. But it's basically this...what sort of community---religious and otherwise---would I and others really be excited to be part of? How could we truly use our gifts to help others, to GO OUT, and not just hang out within the walls of the church (literally and figuratively). And I'm not just talking one thing here, one thing there. I'm talking about a very different approach...a re-orientation of everything.

What do you think that would look like?

Now off to try to make more sense of this, to figure out even what questions there are, let alone answers...and maybe enjoy a bit more warmth. It is, after all the season of fireplaces---and I finally have one that works!

Transitions

As I write, the window is blowing outside my window, and the autumn leaves that were already just on the point of falling, are being blown off trees at an alarming rate! The good news is the weather front that has brought this wind has also brought rain--much needed after a very dry season.

All of this has made me think about how any time of transition is a similar experience--the coming of needed things tied up with the harshness of transitions. Rain, for example, only happens when two fronts (and very different ones at that) slam into each other. The occurrance of rain, as renewing and refreshing as it is, is a pretty violent thing weather-wise.

We still need a lot more rain. And I know that as fall continues and winter comes, the wind will keep up, and rain will turn to snow. And ice even (let's hope not too much). Chris and I are already preparing for the chances of being stranded, or without electricity. We're getting our wood stove and chimney checked out, stocking up on gallons of water (the fun of being on a well!) and keeping dry goods on hand. There's a good chance we won't need much if any of it, but if we do, we'll hopefully be relatively prepared.

Times of transition almost always necessitate preparation of some form. I think we've forgetten that though. I mean, we live lives with so many conveniences that we are used to being able to get anything any time. Many people have no idea what fruits or veggies are "in season" and stocking up for anything seems foreign to us. After all, if we need more, we can just run to the store, right?

I think about early settlers living on "the western frontier"--yes, Missouri was once such an exciting, far-flung place--and all the ways they would be doing things differently right now. For them, preparing for the winter would have been a matter of life or death. The beautiful colors of autumn leaves and the crisp fall temperatures would serve as a warning and an encouragement to get serious about stock piling food, preparing the homestead, and preparing for a long cold winter. The transition would have been very distinct.

So I wonder whether we've lost the sense of the importance--and challenge--of transitions. Transitions are rough and scary things, and are the times we have to be working the hardest. This is as true of preparing for seasons of weather as it is preparing for the different seasons of our lives.

Sunday's Faith Topic

In case you stopped by this blog to find out what Sunday's Faith Topic is, for the Sunday School class, please stop by later today. My husband Chris will be leading the discussion since I'll have to head to the Doubs/Epworth UMC Homecoming right after worship, and he's still thinking about topic ideas. Any suggestions?

Immigration

I am sitting here reading this morning's paper and didn't make it through page one before I got upset! As a member of our conference's Hispanic/Latino Advisory Board in this area, I was glad to see Millie Rivera made the paper. But I was angered to hear about proposal to count illegal immigrants in schools.

Now I understand we all have a different view of this issue, and there are a lot of reasons for that. I know that since illegal immigrants don't pay taxes (they can't, they're "off the books") it means local school systems have an added expense. I hear that the language thing upsets some people. I know there are many other reasons why good, smart people are very concerned about what they would describe as an illegal immigration problem.

But here is what I just don't get. We are all of us (except Native Americans, and we have still found ways to persecute them over the years) immigrants. And you know what, many of our ancestors were unwelcome, and were mocked and hated by others. My own family is nearly entirely German on one side. I know that Germans were vastly criticized for continuing to speak German instead of English when they came here. And the language thing was pretty major--as it is now.

There is a (probably apocryphal) story out of the Methodist tradition that goes something like this: Early in our nation's history, as Methodist blossomed and Otterbein's United Brethren did as well, it was pretty apparent to leaders of both churches the close connections between them. Otterbein had helped ordain Asbury, and Otterbein had adopted the Methodist Book of Disciple by merely translating it into German. As the story goes, two leaders, one from each of these churches, were talking one day. The Methodist asked why the United Brethren wouldn't just join them. The UB said, "Will you let us have German-speaking churches and conferences?" The Methodist replied no, saying the English was the language of the land and they could never allow that. Now look, over a hundred years later those two churches did join, and though there were other reasons for the separation before, it really is pretty much language that was the major difference. The irony is, within a generation or two, without making it an issue, the Germans adopted English. It was just easier for them.

Others in this area, if not of German descent (and really, those of us of German descent ought be be better students of our own history as regards to the divisions that have plagued our own people for hundreds and hundreds of years and how ridiculous it all looks now), there are also those of Irish, Scottish, even those of poor English descent.

What angers me most is the general lack of hospitality that has begun to characterize us. What I find unbearable is when I sit in Advisory Board meetings and I hear about people scared to leave their homes for fear of getting arrested. And what I think we should all find a bit unsettling is the way that our concern about illegal immigrants has turned us and our local government into people it's hard to be proud of---people who see the skin color of a person and ask ourselves first the question of whether they ought to be here or not. This is a prime example of racial profiling. I am told that people of hispanic-looking descent are routinely pulled over or questioned for minor offenses (offenses that I suspect many of us of European descent would rarely if ever be pulled over for, and I really doubt they'd ask us for our status, especially if we aren't the driver of the car).

There is nothing about this racial profiling that feels very Christian to me. That old, "What Would Jesus Do?" cliche ought to give us some pause here.

Now I am not a policy maker, and I know there are many issues tied into this that I am not expert on. But the general tone of it all is troubling to me.

I saw a video of Brian McLauren recently--he's a major church leader of the Emergent Church movement. Brian was talking about how we often like to think that God has blessed this nation, especially those who are reasonably comfortable, etc. But he points out that if you read the Gospels (I mean, you don't even have to read all that closely, it's pretty blatant), it becomes apparent that God doesn't have favorites, but if God did, it would be those who are persecuted, without, hunted, hiding, in prison, hungry, and suffering. I'm pretty sure that puts a lot of us on the wrong side. That doesn't mean God doesn't love us...but I think it calls us to be part of the ministry to those for whom God sorrows and those who are in such need of God's love and hope.

The Godfather

Okay, so I had to write just a bit about my first experience watching "The Godfather." I know. Guys can't imagine I've lived so long and not watched it. But it just wasn't part of the teenaged girl's general experience!

So, since tomorrow is Chris' birthday but we'll be running around with conference meetings, I decided to make his birthday cake tonight...good news is it actually hasn't collapsed yet!

Apparently Chris has been wanting to watch "The Godfather" for a while, so that was tonight's excitement. Honestly, I've heard so many references to the film, that watching it, they all finally make sense. Like in context, the horse head thing fits at least. And "Leave the gun, take the cannolis," does as well.

I wonder what films out today--if any--will carry the same cultural influence of films like "The Godfather." I mean, hey, I hadn't watched the film but at least every few minutes I'd hear a line or see a scene that that had been talked about in some other movie, like "When Harry Met Sally," or "You've Got Mail." Of course, those are more my sort of movies...!

So I'm curious now...what are other film influences? And what will be the film influences of our generation?

What I Miss this Election Season

So our news is filled with all things political these days (well, when they're not talking the economy...or what celebrity is getting divorced now). For me, politics has always been in my blood. Even when I was a child, talking politics was part of our family's discussions, and it has continued to be so. As a teenager, I worked the polls at our local polling place along with my mother, who one year was the polling place coordinator for several sites...so I got one. I passed out flyers and for several primary and general elections, I had the joy or learning at the feet of more experienced associates---men who had been working in local and state campaigns for longer than my mother had been alive, it seemed! All of this was when I was planning to go into politics. It was exciting, and to be honest, it all still is. Through the Baltimore City student government, and as a student member on the school board, I got to see up close and personal the political world, which both excited and concerned me.

Then I heard a call to ministry. And I was reminded of our family's firm adherence to neutrality in public, especially for my father. You see, despite my mother's political involvement and my own father's passion on politicla issues, we never put a sign in our yard, on our car, or otherwise paraded our politics. My father preached on issues but never candidates. And let me tell you, when you are passionate about politics, it really is something to have to be that thoughtful. I mean, so many people parade around their politics, and if they remain "neutral" it's usually an effort at politeness. For a pastor, there are myriad reasons to be publically neutral...all of them very good ones that some pastors would perhaps be better served to take seriously.

So here I am...desperately wanting to wear t-shirts and have bumper stickers like my siblings, and well, a lot of other people. But this is also a reminder to me of the fleeting nature of even these elections. Because whoever wins, I will still be the pastor of people who are all going to vote a variety of ways. Goodness knows just talking about issues can ruffle feathers (I ventured to address the gambling/slots issue this past Sunday, and certainly some weren't thrilled). The other thing is, none of us really know what the future holds, and we all struggle--or at least should--to know whether the same qualities or beliefs that attract us to a candidate are actually indicative of their future leadership. Elections are in some ways an exercise in faith. Or hope at least. Hope that if we all try to be grown-ups about this and learn the issues (and not just the personalities) of the candidates, we will make a good choice. And of course, we all hope everyone else makes as wise of a choice (i.e. same) as us!

And when all of this is over, we still have to live together...so I hope we can all take a deep breath as we head into this campaign season...and maybe think a bit about how our behavior is seen by others during this whole process.