Thursday, April 2, 2015

On an Inauspicious Start to the Triduum

I would like to say my observance of the Triduum, these high holy days leading up to Easter, began with a profundity befitting of such important days. I have this nostalgic longing for my ministry days before kids, when I could start the day in quiet study and reflection on such a day.

Okay, that’s a cop out. I could get up early and have quiet. Except my 19 month old wakes up between 5 and 5:45 a.m. Every. Single. Day. Her sister used to also. I have been waking up before 6 am (against my will, mind you) for over four years now. So yeah.

At any rate, I don’t know if I actually did that before kids. I don’t actually remember. But I like to think I did. And that some day I’ll do that again. Let’s just say that is very much NOT how this year’s Maundy Thursday began.

Instead, I woke grumpy because Mary had inexplicably been up for a couple hours overnight. Now, my husband, who should be sainted, took her for most of that. I had her for 30, maybe 40 minutes before I cracked and had to tap out. I managed to wind myself into my own, “I’m a PASTOR and Maundy Thursday is TOMORROW and this kid needs to GET WITH THE PROGRAM!”

I got more sleep than Chris. I still woke grumpy though.

And you know what happens when Mommy decides to be grumpy? Every other female in the house decides it’s grumpy day too.

Our morning did not go smoothly.

Let’s be honest, though. I have a 4 year old and an 18 month old. Our mornings rarely go smoothly.

BUT THIS IS MAUNDY THURSDAY. What happened to the Gospel of Mark’s account of God just making things happen? Sure, disciples, here’s a donkey, take it. Here, disciples, is this random guy who will lead you to a room to prepare for Passover.

WHY DOESN’T THIS EVER HAPPEN IN A PASTOR’S HOUSE DURING HOLY WEEK?

Here’s the thing about me. I freak out. A to-do list the size of what I began today with becomes oppressively overwhelming. And nothing helps. Except starting to DO stuff.  Anything, really. I thrive on momentum. I actually thrive in crunch time. You know what is really good at preventing you from getting to work and getting ANYTHING done? Small children. This is a scientifically proven fact, and so says every scientist who ever tried to get out of the house in the morning and drop off small children at daycare on the way to their lab.

Finally, it happened, we were out the door. Now, you have to understand, the 20 feet from our door to my minivan are the longest 20 feet EVER in the morning. But we did it. I got the girls dropped at school (not without Mary melting down with her sister’s attempt to help her get Mary’s coat off ended in Mary face planting into the floor…).

Then I was headed to work. To the office where HUNDREDS of bulletins needed to be printed and folded, and tons of prep stuff needed to happen. On the way, I needed to pop by a nursing home to visit a church member who, if I didn’t get to see today, well, at the rate things were going, I wasn’t going to be able to dig out from bulletins and sermons till Pentecost…

Then came the call. A call from my husband. This incredible, amazing man I got to marry. Now, Chris knows me well. He knows my morning frustrations and anxieties melt once I start tackling my to do list. He’s gotten really good at calming helping all three of his ladies navigate the mornings and get out the door. He knows we’ll be fine once we’re halfway down the driveway.

Today, though, I get this call from him and he says, “So what do you want me to get you from Starbucks?”

More powerful loving words have never been spoken. Those words promised not only caffeine (I’d already decided a trip for caffeine on the way to the office was needed) but that he was coming. Unplanned. Unasked. Coming to help.

My morning started rocky. But today I got done two days of work in one day. My husband’s hospitality and love continues to amaze me. I love talking about Christian hospitality, not because I’m good at it (I could stand to grow a lot to say the least) but because Chris excels at it. It’s a good thing he’s a camp and retreat center director. I still think Boy Scouts (OF ALL PEOPLE!!!) should show up for a weekend camping out with some form of fire-creation. Matches. Lighter. Rubbing sticks together. You know who happily takes then a lighter? This guy. This guy I married.

The retreat group with crazy requests. The ones I tell him, “You need to make them be responsible for their own actions and choices. Family Systems Theory. You know, we need to be responsible for yourselves. Who doesn’t bring sheets?” You know what he does after I say that? He goes and takes them sheets. Heck, he’ll probably even take them a pillow. The staff he works with are just the same. Strange, weird people.

Some people excel at offering others hospitality but struggle with those closest to them. Chris does not.

I cannot help but reflect on this today, as I join with Christians around the world to reflect on Jesus’ love and sacrifice for us. Now, my husband is not God. Or Jesus (the fact I often mistype his name “Chris” as “Christ” is, I suspect, a job hazard).

But isn’t this how God comes to us? Precisely when we’re out the end of our energies. Trying to hold it together ourselves. And failing miserably. Maybe we didn’t ask for Jesus. We didn’t know how God would fix it all. To be honest, we would have chosen another way.

God shows up.

We get to be drawn into what God is doing, and we get to be drawn in together.

I hope that the days ahead will be for you more than a place-holder between now and Easter. I hope it will be an opportunity for you to reflect on the places in your life you have been trying to work out yourself, but not doing very well at. I hope it will be a time to reflect on how you’ve tried to define community as those most like you. At how maybe you’ve even tried to make God come to you on your own terms. I hope you will be able, but God’s grace, to lay all this at the feet of the cross.

And then, wait and see what our God, the God who SHOWS UP (you know, Emmanuel) does with it all, and with your life and the world.


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