My brother Daniel graduates from Drew University tomorrow with an MDiv. Despite the fact the I got the very same degree from Duke, our two experiences were s different--and these differences are highlighted by the closures--Baccalaureate, Graduation, etc.
I'm sitting waiting for Drew's Baccalaureate...interfaith, sparcely attended, held in a gym, kicked off by. Women's a-cappella group singing Sarah McLauchlin's "Arms of an Angel". Now, o guess for a universit-wide service this is appropriate. I realize we were a bit spoiled at Duke.
Our Baccalaureate was ours alone. It was full on Christian--the kind of high church Methodism (Anglican envy almost) that characterizes the Div School at Duke. Everyone attended--as opposed to the next day's university graduation, when only a few of us robed. (Oprah wasn't the speaker then...perhaps more of my classmates would have braved the graduation heat).
For me this just reminds me how much these places shape us. From longing for stone work in a church to searching the bulletin hard to find a hint of Scripture reading. Duke, like any seminary, shakes us up and spits us out, for better or worse molded by the community and life we've shared there.
Daniel seems quite at ease at this Baccalaureate. It is the experience he's had here-one that opens his heart to all the differences around us. And who knows. Maybe someday I'll drag him down to Pastor's School at Duke, and he can get all drawn into the organ, robes, etc.
Oooo...here we go though...any service that starts with Mark Miller processing with a drum is going to be good...stone walls or not...
Friday, May 15, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Stages of Ministry
I've been pondering the different stages of ministry lately--both because of the ongoing appointment process, but also because of my involvement in the annual conference worship planning...recent weeks have included...
-buying the gifts for the ordinands
-contacting families of this year's deceased pastors (and spouses and lay members to conference)
-contacting this year's retirees
-working through transitional/key issues in my current appointment
-beginning preparations for my new appointment
-"overhearing" my brother's appointment to part-time ministry and his candidacy journey
-hearing of others' appointments
-pondering the effects of clergy misconduct on the church
-a teen hearing a call to ministry
On and on.
What is cool, I think, is the way as United Methodists that we're always engaged in these (okay, you could try to avoid them, I guess, but it would be hard) because of the connectional system. We're always in touch with these various stages of ministry because we're surrounded by people with whom we share this ministry journey who are also at different places. Or people going through similar things who are nonetheless at different places.
Here's an example. One of my supervising pastors from seminary, Scott, is--like me--being reappointed this year. But at that point, the similarities diminish. Scott has a much longer period in ministry, and has been at his current church longer than me. He's going to a church where he and his wife will co-pastor. On and on. But in the midst of all that, it's kind of cool to think of how we are all in this together.
At the same time, I've been feeling quite reflective of my own stages of ministry. I guess that's normal as I prepare for a new appointment. I've been remembering what it was like to anticipate starting at my current appointment. It was different then. I was so ready to be done with school (now, of course, days to sit around and read theology and scripture sounds divine). I wanted to get out and put into practice all I learned. Now I wish I could go back because I'd really be able to soak in what I needed to know.
And then there was starting. Arriving for this new adventure. Discovering myself and my appointment more and more as time passed. Now I wish I'd known even more when I started--hence my extensive attempt to pass on info to the new pastor (for example, I wanted to make sure to show him where ALL of the sanctuary light switches are--no one ever told me and I discovered another switch after several months!).
There's also something significant, it seems to me, when all of a sudden, you job really becomes a career (now I know ministry is a "life"...but you know what I mean). I think it's tied up in getting the SECOND job in the same field. I mean, the first is a fluke, right? It's when you start progressing (one way or another) that a career is made. I've started thinking in more tangible ways of what this "career" may entail, and the opportunity to be able to "think back about my first appointment" still seems like a strange concept...and perhaps will for a while even when I start at Calvary.
I think it's somewhat natural for a pastor to identify themselves with their appointments to an extent (this can of course be taken to unhealthy lengths) so it will be interesting to see what it feels like to change such a huge piece of this part of my identity. After all, all the other transitions in my personal life involved a change at a turning point. High school to college. College to grad school. Grad school to commissioning and an appointment. Now, I face a transition within this one thing. It's a big transition, but it's not so directly a new phase of my life...but in other ways it really is.
One of the things I learned about myself as Chris and I prepared to be married and I've been reminded of recently as I have packed books for my new office (Chris is happy because it halves the amount of book shelves we need at home!) is how much I don't like packing. It's emotionally exhausting for me. You'd think because we moved so much as kids, with dad as a pastor, I'd be used to it. And there are parts that I am. But there's something about packing and sealing boxes that just strikes me as DEPRESSING! Even when I'm otherwise very excited about the move.
Because I roomed with my sister at camp for the months before the wedding, Chris and I had packed and moved all my stuff a month before the wedding. I remember standing in the parsonage, in the midst of boxes, just overcome. I was so excited about what this move represented, but the drain of such a big change was still a lot. I had no reservations about the marriage, but the energy and emotion invested in it all was just exhausting.
I think the same is true now. In my head and in my heart I'm excited about this move. But the unknown still haunts, and the self-questioning (Am I up to it? Will I do well? Will they like me? Will I like them? Will I be able to be myself? What will their expectations of me be? What don't I know that I should? etc) never ends.
But in the midst of all of that, the very transitions that have been scary in the past, good or bad as they were, remind me of what I need to face this one: God has been with me in all of these, and God will be with me. I love the words from the song "Can't Give Up Now" by gospel group Mary Mary:
Nobody told me the road would be easy
and I don`t believe he brought me this far to leave me
And I guess that's it. For all the stages of ministry, what we do know and have confidence in is that God is in all of this. Maybe not always exactly how we'd like. And maybe the overwhelming, scary, and even downright painful parts of these transitions can't be made easy in a moment. But God who has brought us this far calls us forth, and that's something. In fact, that's everything.
-buying the gifts for the ordinands
-contacting families of this year's deceased pastors (and spouses and lay members to conference)
-contacting this year's retirees
-working through transitional/key issues in my current appointment
-beginning preparations for my new appointment
-"overhearing" my brother's appointment to part-time ministry and his candidacy journey
-hearing of others' appointments
-pondering the effects of clergy misconduct on the church
-a teen hearing a call to ministry
On and on.
What is cool, I think, is the way as United Methodists that we're always engaged in these (okay, you could try to avoid them, I guess, but it would be hard) because of the connectional system. We're always in touch with these various stages of ministry because we're surrounded by people with whom we share this ministry journey who are also at different places. Or people going through similar things who are nonetheless at different places.
Here's an example. One of my supervising pastors from seminary, Scott, is--like me--being reappointed this year. But at that point, the similarities diminish. Scott has a much longer period in ministry, and has been at his current church longer than me. He's going to a church where he and his wife will co-pastor. On and on. But in the midst of all that, it's kind of cool to think of how we are all in this together.
At the same time, I've been feeling quite reflective of my own stages of ministry. I guess that's normal as I prepare for a new appointment. I've been remembering what it was like to anticipate starting at my current appointment. It was different then. I was so ready to be done with school (now, of course, days to sit around and read theology and scripture sounds divine). I wanted to get out and put into practice all I learned. Now I wish I could go back because I'd really be able to soak in what I needed to know.
And then there was starting. Arriving for this new adventure. Discovering myself and my appointment more and more as time passed. Now I wish I'd known even more when I started--hence my extensive attempt to pass on info to the new pastor (for example, I wanted to make sure to show him where ALL of the sanctuary light switches are--no one ever told me and I discovered another switch after several months!).
There's also something significant, it seems to me, when all of a sudden, you job really becomes a career (now I know ministry is a "life"...but you know what I mean). I think it's tied up in getting the SECOND job in the same field. I mean, the first is a fluke, right? It's when you start progressing (one way or another) that a career is made. I've started thinking in more tangible ways of what this "career" may entail, and the opportunity to be able to "think back about my first appointment" still seems like a strange concept...and perhaps will for a while even when I start at Calvary.
I think it's somewhat natural for a pastor to identify themselves with their appointments to an extent (this can of course be taken to unhealthy lengths) so it will be interesting to see what it feels like to change such a huge piece of this part of my identity. After all, all the other transitions in my personal life involved a change at a turning point. High school to college. College to grad school. Grad school to commissioning and an appointment. Now, I face a transition within this one thing. It's a big transition, but it's not so directly a new phase of my life...but in other ways it really is.
One of the things I learned about myself as Chris and I prepared to be married and I've been reminded of recently as I have packed books for my new office (Chris is happy because it halves the amount of book shelves we need at home!) is how much I don't like packing. It's emotionally exhausting for me. You'd think because we moved so much as kids, with dad as a pastor, I'd be used to it. And there are parts that I am. But there's something about packing and sealing boxes that just strikes me as DEPRESSING! Even when I'm otherwise very excited about the move.
Because I roomed with my sister at camp for the months before the wedding, Chris and I had packed and moved all my stuff a month before the wedding. I remember standing in the parsonage, in the midst of boxes, just overcome. I was so excited about what this move represented, but the drain of such a big change was still a lot. I had no reservations about the marriage, but the energy and emotion invested in it all was just exhausting.
I think the same is true now. In my head and in my heart I'm excited about this move. But the unknown still haunts, and the self-questioning (Am I up to it? Will I do well? Will they like me? Will I like them? Will I be able to be myself? What will their expectations of me be? What don't I know that I should? etc) never ends.
But in the midst of all of that, the very transitions that have been scary in the past, good or bad as they were, remind me of what I need to face this one: God has been with me in all of these, and God will be with me. I love the words from the song "Can't Give Up Now" by gospel group Mary Mary:
Nobody told me the road would be easy
and I don`t believe he brought me this far to leave me
And I guess that's it. For all the stages of ministry, what we do know and have confidence in is that God is in all of this. Maybe not always exactly how we'd like. And maybe the overwhelming, scary, and even downright painful parts of these transitions can't be made easy in a moment. But God who has brought us this far calls us forth, and that's something. In fact, that's everything.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Rain
So I understand all the reasons the rain is good. Really, I do. Living out in the country, I promise, I do. And I know this has of late become a cliche on Facebook and Twitter...but...I miss the sun! :-/
This morning, trying to stick to my decision to rock the socks of the Virgin Healthmiles pedometer I get through my GBPHB plan, I headed out to walk in the rain for the third or fourth time this week. Mercifully if didn't rain the entire time...and I know the heat of the summer will make the walk unpleasant, but boy I cannot wait for a nice clear, sunny day to walk!
Otherwise, though, the rain has been only partially inconvenient for the rest of my week, since I've spent the greater part of it in meetings. Ad Council meetings. Finance meetings. Tonight a parsonage trustees meeting. I guess that's just the cost of preparing for a new pastor to arrive while also reconfiguring a charge relationship. The good news is, thus far, things seem to be going ok. And once I get through this week, I won't have many meetings left here.
I noticed that UM Communications was pretty busy yesterday on twitter updating about the ReThink church campaign kick-offs in DC and New York. Laying aside my general suspicion of our denomination getting too giddy with its own marketing, I'm excited to see where this goes. I hope it really becomes a movement, a change of thinking, for the entire denomination, not just a PR line. It ties in with the 10 Thousand Doors line too. Check out more at www.10thousanddoors.org and www.rethinkchurch.org.
What do you think of the whole ReThink Church thing?
This morning, trying to stick to my decision to rock the socks of the Virgin Healthmiles pedometer I get through my GBPHB plan, I headed out to walk in the rain for the third or fourth time this week. Mercifully if didn't rain the entire time...and I know the heat of the summer will make the walk unpleasant, but boy I cannot wait for a nice clear, sunny day to walk!
Otherwise, though, the rain has been only partially inconvenient for the rest of my week, since I've spent the greater part of it in meetings. Ad Council meetings. Finance meetings. Tonight a parsonage trustees meeting. I guess that's just the cost of preparing for a new pastor to arrive while also reconfiguring a charge relationship. The good news is, thus far, things seem to be going ok. And once I get through this week, I won't have many meetings left here.
I noticed that UM Communications was pretty busy yesterday on twitter updating about the ReThink church campaign kick-offs in DC and New York. Laying aside my general suspicion of our denomination getting too giddy with its own marketing, I'm excited to see where this goes. I hope it really becomes a movement, a change of thinking, for the entire denomination, not just a PR line. It ties in with the 10 Thousand Doors line too. Check out more at www.10thousanddoors.org and www.rethinkchurch.org.
What do you think of the whole ReThink Church thing?
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Bixby Letter
And by the way...
So my sermon series through the end of my time at Jefferson is going to use the motif of "letters." So this week one of the things I've been researching is famous letters. Of course one of the best know is Abraham Lincoln's Bixby letter. If you're not a history buff, you may remember it being quoted in Saving Private Ryan. Interestingly (and perhaps sadly) my research led me to find out that not everything is as simple as it seems with the letter (isn't that how things usually turn out...!).
Check out any write up on this to see what I mean...of course there's always Wikipedia:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Letter_to_Mrs._Bixby
So my sermon series through the end of my time at Jefferson is going to use the motif of "letters." So this week one of the things I've been researching is famous letters. Of course one of the best know is Abraham Lincoln's Bixby letter. If you're not a history buff, you may remember it being quoted in Saving Private Ryan. Interestingly (and perhaps sadly) my research led me to find out that not everything is as simple as it seems with the letter (isn't that how things usually turn out...!).
Check out any write up on this to see what I mean...of course there's always Wikipedia:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Letter_to_Mrs._Bixby
That Which Is New
So I just logged on to Blogger and realized I could set up to SMS text to this blog. Fun. Which I think makes it essentially like Twitter (in theory, if you wanted) at least for my page. I'm all about technology, but now that all the different sites are learning from each other what works, some of the elements of Blogger, Twitter and Facebook are becoming increasingly similar...perhaps someday I'll have to choose...
I'm catching back up after (1) Holy Week and (2) being away on vacation in Minnesota with my husband Chris. That post-Easter week is a really great time, I've learned for a break for a pastor, and also comes at a good time for Chris, being before the summer gets into full swing and all.
It was a lot of fun to visit with Chris' parents, to meet lots of his friends for the first time as well, and to see the sights of his youth. Chris got to grow up in one house nearly his whole life (I can't even imagine!) so it was fun to see that, to see his church, to visit the camp he attended and worked at, etc. I could post a ton more about the trip...perhaps I'll get around to downloading pictures, and will post those, which will help illustrate better at any rate.
As soon as I got back into things, though, I discovered what most people re-learn after returning from each vacation--the mound of work you return to makes you, for a moment at least, wonder whether it was even worth it. Well, the trip was totally worth it for me, but I find myself now, on top of playing catch-up, really digging into the plans for the coming months and preparing for the pastoral transition at Jefferson/Doubs. That in itself is a beast. And that on top of the regular duties of the pastorate, my work with the annual conference worship committee, using spare time to help Chris with camp prep...it just stays busy. But the up side of having a lot to do, is that it also means you will have accomplished A LOT when it's done (I like checking things of lists...)
My final Sunday at Jefferson will be June 21. As I looked at worship planning this week, tried to get a handle on my calendar, and tried to get a firm idea on pacing everything out, I know that these (less than) two months will fly by.
All that said, however, I'm very excited for this transition. It will be a good one for the Jefferson/Doubs charge, and a great new opportunity for Chris and I. We're looking forward to getting to know the folks at Calvary, though in all that I have on my plate, thinking too much about my new appointment is taking back seat at the moment. There will be some of that in the coming months, but July 1 will be here before I know it.
I sat down this week and started making progress on the "check list" of items to prepare for the new pastor. And as long as that is (three pages) I also realized there are things I need to pass on that aren't listed! I worry I'll have a novel or something by the time I'm done. That's better, though, I figure, than not. The more information to pass on the better. For example, it took me MONTHS to figure out there were two locations of switches for the sanctuary. Who knew?!! Well, apparently everyone but me! They all though I knew! I plan to show Paul, the new pastor, BOTH! Of, and also that the island in the kitchen at Jefferson is one wheels and moves. That one surprised me too...
This weekend my brother Jordan and sister Liz are at our house. Chris has a BIG weekend at Manidokan, and today was full of ropes so he needed the extra help. It's nice to be able to see them, and I can't wait to my brother Daniel graduates from Drew (with his MDiv) in a couple weeks and moves to camp (he's the chaplain for the summer)!
There are so many other things I want to post, but I'll have to dive into those next week. For now, I've got to polish things off for Sunday, hang out with the fam., and try not to melt in this 90+ weather (in April?!!)
I'm catching back up after (1) Holy Week and (2) being away on vacation in Minnesota with my husband Chris. That post-Easter week is a really great time, I've learned for a break for a pastor, and also comes at a good time for Chris, being before the summer gets into full swing and all.
It was a lot of fun to visit with Chris' parents, to meet lots of his friends for the first time as well, and to see the sights of his youth. Chris got to grow up in one house nearly his whole life (I can't even imagine!) so it was fun to see that, to see his church, to visit the camp he attended and worked at, etc. I could post a ton more about the trip...perhaps I'll get around to downloading pictures, and will post those, which will help illustrate better at any rate.
As soon as I got back into things, though, I discovered what most people re-learn after returning from each vacation--the mound of work you return to makes you, for a moment at least, wonder whether it was even worth it. Well, the trip was totally worth it for me, but I find myself now, on top of playing catch-up, really digging into the plans for the coming months and preparing for the pastoral transition at Jefferson/Doubs. That in itself is a beast. And that on top of the regular duties of the pastorate, my work with the annual conference worship committee, using spare time to help Chris with camp prep...it just stays busy. But the up side of having a lot to do, is that it also means you will have accomplished A LOT when it's done (I like checking things of lists...)
My final Sunday at Jefferson will be June 21. As I looked at worship planning this week, tried to get a handle on my calendar, and tried to get a firm idea on pacing everything out, I know that these (less than) two months will fly by.
All that said, however, I'm very excited for this transition. It will be a good one for the Jefferson/Doubs charge, and a great new opportunity for Chris and I. We're looking forward to getting to know the folks at Calvary, though in all that I have on my plate, thinking too much about my new appointment is taking back seat at the moment. There will be some of that in the coming months, but July 1 will be here before I know it.
I sat down this week and started making progress on the "check list" of items to prepare for the new pastor. And as long as that is (three pages) I also realized there are things I need to pass on that aren't listed! I worry I'll have a novel or something by the time I'm done. That's better, though, I figure, than not. The more information to pass on the better. For example, it took me MONTHS to figure out there were two locations of switches for the sanctuary. Who knew?!! Well, apparently everyone but me! They all though I knew! I plan to show Paul, the new pastor, BOTH! Of, and also that the island in the kitchen at Jefferson is one wheels and moves. That one surprised me too...
This weekend my brother Jordan and sister Liz are at our house. Chris has a BIG weekend at Manidokan, and today was full of ropes so he needed the extra help. It's nice to be able to see them, and I can't wait to my brother Daniel graduates from Drew (with his MDiv) in a couple weeks and moves to camp (he's the chaplain for the summer)!
There are so many other things I want to post, but I'll have to dive into those next week. For now, I've got to polish things off for Sunday, hang out with the fam., and try not to melt in this 90+ weather (in April?!!)
Monday, April 6, 2009
Today's Random Thought
So I actually really want to blog about a motion coming to Annual Conference this year about setting some guidelines and minimums for congregations as they look at what type of pastoral appointment (full, 3/4 time, half time, etc.) to seek. And I will. But not tonight. After all, today is my day off, and at any rate, my brain has largely shut down. So perhaps I'll post tomorrow. It being Holy Week and all, things are busy for me, but blogging always seems to be a nice way to take a break from the craziness of a week or day and still be (somewhat peripherally at least) working.
But I didn't want to just dork out on blogging today...especially since it's been a few days. So...for now...
My husband came across this hilarious site that teases people for mistakes, or just downright trying silly things. Check it out (for a few laughs) at www.failblog.org
But I didn't want to just dork out on blogging today...especially since it's been a few days. So...for now...
My husband came across this hilarious site that teases people for mistakes, or just downright trying silly things. Check it out (for a few laughs) at www.failblog.org
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Praise
This week's sermon theme, as it is Palm Sunday, is PRAISE. As we've done throughout Lent on each week's theme, we'll be looking at how Jesus' faces it, and how we can face it. What we've ended up really seeing in all of these is that in and of themselves theses (expectations, resistance, praise) are actually quite healthy. What turns them into dangers are when they are extreme or expressed in unhealthy ways. Really, it's much the same as what C.S. Lewis explained about sin in The Great Divorce.
Here are some quotes and stories about pride and praise I've come across as I prepare. They come from www.sermonillustrations.com and www.thinkexist.com, both sites I use, or at least look over, somewhat regularly:
Academy Award-winning actor Charlton Heston has not always had rave reviews. He says he learned "The most valuable single truth about criticism" from Laurence Olivier: We'd done a blank-verse play on Broadway...and the blank verse was not Shakespeare. The critics slaughtered us--before the opening-night party we were doomed. Forty minutes later I found myself alone in a restaurant with Olivier and a bottle of brandy. I was young, green and striving for mature detachment. "Well," I said philosophically, I suppose you learn how to forget the bad notices." Olivier gripped my elbow.. "Laddie!" he said. "What's much harder, and far more important...you have to learn to forget the good ones." He was right. (American Film, January 1992.)
My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-Indira Gandhi, Bits and Pieces, April 1990, p. 11.
“There is not one wise man in twenty that will praise himself.”
-William Shakespeare
“I praise loudly, I blame softly”
-Catherine the Great
“We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess”
-Mark Twain
“The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.”
-Norman Vincent Peale
Here are some quotes and stories about pride and praise I've come across as I prepare. They come from www.sermonillustrations.com and www.thinkexist.com, both sites I use, or at least look over, somewhat regularly:
Academy Award-winning actor Charlton Heston has not always had rave reviews. He says he learned "The most valuable single truth about criticism" from Laurence Olivier: We'd done a blank-verse play on Broadway...and the blank verse was not Shakespeare. The critics slaughtered us--before the opening-night party we were doomed. Forty minutes later I found myself alone in a restaurant with Olivier and a bottle of brandy. I was young, green and striving for mature detachment. "Well," I said philosophically, I suppose you learn how to forget the bad notices." Olivier gripped my elbow.. "Laddie!" he said. "What's much harder, and far more important...you have to learn to forget the good ones." He was right. (American Film, January 1992.)
My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-Indira Gandhi, Bits and Pieces, April 1990, p. 11.
“There is not one wise man in twenty that will praise himself.”
-William Shakespeare
“I praise loudly, I blame softly”
-Catherine the Great
“We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess”
-Mark Twain
“The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.”
-Norman Vincent Peale
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